Is lying for a good cause justified?
At times, we feel the need to say things which may not hold true. We do this in order to protect somebody. In other words, we speak a ‘lie’ out of kindness to the other person. However, if the person later finds out the truth, then is it worse than that act of kindness?
It is true that when we lie out of kindness and the lie is found out, the person who received the lie feels hurt. But that doesn’t matter. What matters is the motive behind lying. Was the motive for lying to hurt the other person? No. So, be guilt-free.
We take somebody else’s reactions and take it upon ourselves and assume the responsibility for them. But why should we? We did the act out of kindness and if the other person takes it otherwise, then that is their responsibility and not ours.
If it leads to the breaking up of a relationship, so be it. Then it wasn’t a relationship in the first place. Because if it were truly a relationship, then the person who received the lie would know that there was a good motive—a motive to protect, a motive of kindness behind it. There wouldn’t be the hurt.
A friend is a person who understands what we mean even when we don’t say it; somebody who reads between the lines, who understands what is unsaid. So when we say something and it is a lie and is found out, the friend will say that this lie was said to me out of kindness. If he/she is not a friend, they will say that they have been cheated and betrayed. In either case, it is not for us to assume the responsibility of their reaction. Our act of lying was out of kindness, and that is all that matters.